The phone screen lights the dark room
I look down at his name across the screen
The deep pit crawls from the ache of my stomach into my chest
No matter how many days pass without a word from him
No matter the length of time he can go without seeing me
I can’t seem to pull away
I lay in bed crunched into a tight ball
I want to reach for the phone but I already know what he says
He knows I’m vulnerable
He knows this hold he has on me
Beating after emotional beating, I long for his lust
I ache for his attention, and he knows this
Night after night I stare into blackness wondering all the why’s
Why can’t he succumb to these overbearing feelings like I have?
Why does he hide from the powerful pull he and I have on each other?
He knows this. I can’t turn away
I rise in the morning, exhausted from the overload of thoughts
Drained with the thought of facing yet another day
Will today be a day I cross his mind? Will tonight be a night he crawls into bed next to me?
The phone screens lights up the dark room
And ignites the uncontrollable twinkle he brings to my eye